Last night, I asked my husband to let me know when he would like to take the night shift duty with the kids. This will be the first time since Isabel's birth nearly 5 months ago that I've asked him to do this. I'm home with the girls every night while he is at work and then I get up with them if they have needs during the night.
Unfortunately Isabel has started nursing during the night again. I need to work on getting her to eat more during the day, but for now she gets a middle of the night snack. It's not really a huge deal to me, but it would be nice to sleep for 6-8 hours without having to get up.
I could get more sleep if I made myself go to bed after the girls go down. But, I'm trying to somewhat stick to my late night schedule so it's not so hard for me to transition back when I return to work in April. So a typical night goes like this:
- Isabel goes down around 10pm.
- Alexis goes down between 10:30 and 11:30.
- Then it's Me time until Ross gets home around 12:15-12:30.
- We usually watch TV together until about 1:30-2 then go to bed.
- Isabel has been waking up to eat between 2 & 3.
- Then she's awake for her early morning feeding between 7 & 8.
- Up for the day usually around 9.
Anyway, back to last night. I was asking Ross if he would take the night shift some night when he was up for it. I was thinking it would be a weekend night when he didn't have to work the next day.
You should have seen his face when I asked him. It was like he couldn't believe such words came out of my mouth. I kept looking at him waiting for an answer and this is what he finally said. "When you go back to work I'll consider taking night duty."
"So, because I stay home all day long I'm not allowed to get a full nights sleep?" I told him that was the most sexist, pig-est thing he's ever said to me and I shut off the light and went to sleep. (Actually I didn't get to go to sleep until 3:30, because I was up with Isabel and then Alexis too.)
I really couldn't believe that he acted that way, it shouldn't surprise me though. He almost acted mad the other day when he had to put away clean dishes and load dirty ones into the dishwasher.
I'm sorry, this may sound a bit selfish, but I don't think it's too much for him to help me just a little. Just because I'm a temporary stay at home mom does mean I don't need a little help or want a break from time to time. Is that asking too much??
I would love for him to walk in my shoes for one week, and I would gladly go to his work for him too. I know that his job and our remodel project are stressful to him too, but I don't think he really understands that just because I stay at home right now, that everything is not peaches and cream for me.
I would really appreciate some feedback on how you and your spouse handle similar situations and if I'm being unreasonable.
FYI: I never asked him to give Alexis bottles of breast milk so I could sleep, I always nursed her. I was going to try something new with Isabel and let him give her a bottle while I slept and then pump in the morning. I'm extra, super careful about never giving bottles unless I'm at work, just so they don't start to prefer bottle over breast and so my supply stays good.